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My Mysterious Parcel

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 5:31 am
by Adam Adamant
Firstly, I can't believe they locked my first thread, that was really going places. They're all bloody philistines here.

Secondly, to Esrever, 'narc', I do believe, is slang for a narcotics officer, i.e. someone who ruins the fun.

But the Point Of This Thread...

I was just awoken by the doorbell (it's about 11.15 here in the sunny UK), rushing downstairs I found a delivery man at the door. I signed for this parcel, addressed to me. But... I have no idea what it is. Usually when you recieve a parcel you know what it's gonna be, you've been waiting for it or whatever. But this was totally out of the blue. Plus!!! It's bloody massive, about the size of two bread bins stuck together!

So anyway, I open it, it takes ages because there's all kinds of tape on it. And inside... Lord of the Rings figurines!!!!!!!!!!

There's a small Gandalf one and taking up the bulk of the package is a massive Fell Beast, those flying things that the Ring Wraiths ride.

I have worked out that the company who sent it to me is somehow affiliated with a a skateboard shop I ordered some things from a week ago. They must have simply put the wrong sticker on the box as the delivery slip inside is addressed to someone else.

But what do you think I should do? Will they work out they sent it to me and start harrassing me to send it back? Or will they just send out another? Keep in mind the fact that I have no interest in LOTR figurines and nowhere to put a Fell Beast with a 32" wing span.

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 5:56 am
by Baba O'Reily
...You measured the wingspan?

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 6:17 am
by Popcorn
Guys, be gentle. This is a friend of mine. The GHZ is an acquired taste, so we'll just have to let him acquire it.

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 6:25 am
by WhoopA
I know that in the US if you recieve a package and you didn't order what's inside, you're under no obligation to return the package or its contents. Maybe it's the same in the UK and if so congratulations, pass those figurines to a friend who DOES have an interest XD

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 7:25 am
by Baba O'Reily
Popcorn wrote:This is a friend of mine. The GHZ is an acquired taste,
*Insert joke about Pop's mum here*

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 7:31 am
by Adam Adamant
No the wingspan is written on the box. I'm too scared to open it incase they bust me or something.

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 11:23 am
by Delphine
Popcorn wrote:Guys, be gentle.
Please, someone make a joke of this. I spent all my cleverness this morning trying to arrange my classes in a schedule that wouldn't murder me, but this has POTENTIAL.

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 12:13 pm
by G.Silver
Obviously you should send it back. </prude>

I've been sent things that weren't supposed to be sent to me before and if you call up the retailer, they should tell you that they will pay for any return shipping fees. If you don't want the things anyway, then there's definitly no point in risking getting into trouble, though since it was a mistake on their end I don't think it's too likely that they'll come bust you (you probably wouldn't make any friends either though)

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 12:23 pm
by plasticwingsband

Posted: Wed Nov 24, 2004 1:42 pm
by Grant
Delphine wrote:
Popcorn wrote:Guys, be gentle.
Please, someone make a joke of this.
This seems like the perfect opportunity to tie together Zeta's boyfriend and Baba's penchant for animal sex with Popcorn's mother in a terribly raunchy sex joke involving anal stimulation and bicycle handles, and yet I can't seem to put the words together.

Thus, I must defer to j-man. Or Zeta. Or plasticwingsband or Baba or ...etc, etc.

Posted: Wed Nov 24, 2004 1:44 pm
by Baba O'Reily
Collaborations are for rappers, washed up musicians, Brian May, and zombie armies.

Posted: Wed Nov 24, 2004 10:11 pm
by Zeta
And crappy country western singers.

Of course, that's redundant.

Posted: Thu Nov 25, 2004 4:47 am
by The Scarlet Scorpion
Adam, is it true that you're as bold as a knight in white armor and as cold as a shot from a gun? Or that you love danger?

I just hope love won't always be your stranger...


Adam Adamant wrote:Firstly, I can't believe they locked my first thread, that was really going places. They're all bloody philistines here.

Secondly, to Esrever, 'narc', I do believe, is slang for a narcotics officer, i.e. someone who ruins the fun.

But the Point Of This Thread...

I was just awoken by the doorbell (it's about 11.15 here in the sunny UK), rushing downstairs I found a delivery man at the door. I signed for this parcel, addressed to me. But... I have no idea what it is. Usually when you recieve a parcel you know what it's gonna be, you've been waiting for it or whatever. But this was totally out of the blue. Plus!!! It's bloody massive, about the size of two bread bins stuck together!

So anyway, I open it, it takes ages because there's all kinds of tape on it. And inside... Lord of the Rings figurines!!!!!!!!!!

There's a small Gandalf one and taking up the bulk of the package is a massive Fell Beast, those flying things that the Ring Wraiths ride.

I have worked out that the company who sent it to me is somehow affiliated with a a skateboard shop I ordered some things from a week ago. They must have simply put the wrong sticker on the box as the delivery slip inside is addressed to someone else.

But what do you think I should do? Will they work out they sent it to me and start harrassing me to send it back? Or will they just send out another? Keep in mind the fact that I have no interest in LOTR figurines and nowhere to put a Fell Beast with a 32" wing span.
The first thread was locked due it it being A.) spammish, and B.) we've had some problem with Trolls over the years, so we try not to take any chances (one such Troll, in fact, was also a friend of Pop's: the fiend known as "Bobadole").

And as for "narc," I long thought it was the legal reference as well, until I found out it actually started out as eighteenth century Underworld slang for "nose". How it got it's present meaning I really have no idea...

As for the toy, being the law-abiding fellow I am, I would implore you to do the right thing and return it. I mean, think of the poor schnook who's out there waiting for his package, and is probably getting right steamed at the company because of it. You don't want a lawsuit on your hands, do you? Neither does the company.

Or maybe I'm just over-moralizing. ;)


Zeta wrote:And crappy country western singers.

Of course, that's redundant.
Actually, I rather like Dolly Parton, and not just for the obvious reason. She's actually an amiable, talented person with a good sense of humor.

That jingoist Tim McGraw, on the other hand, can burn in hell.


Popcorn wrote:Guys, be gentle. This is a friend of mine. The GHZ is an acquired taste, so we'll just have to let him acquire it.
Baba O'Riley wrote:*Insert joke about Pop's mum here*
Delphine wrote:Please, someone make a joke of this. I spent all my cleverness this morning trying to arrange my classes in a schedule that wouldn't murder me, but this has POTENTIAL.
Amazing Grant wrote:This seems like the perfect opportunity to tie together Zeta's boyfriend and Baba's penchant for animal sex with Popcorn's mother in a terribly raunchy sex joke involving anal stimulation and bicycle handles, and yet I can't seem to put the words together.

Thus, I must defer to j-man. Or Zeta. Or plasticwingsband or Baba or ...etc, etc.
Okay.
Popcorn wrote:Guys, be gentle. This is a friend of mine. The GHZ is an acquired taste, so we'll just have to let him acquire it.
Del, you hold him down, GG!, get the funnell...

And where's the Rouge the Bat blow-up doll?!






But first, here's some forms you have to sign...

Posted: Thu Nov 25, 2004 7:20 pm
by j-man
That's not what your mum said last night when Zeta's boyfriend in a fox suit was fucking Popcorn's mum in the arse with a buttered bicycle handle while giving Baba a blowjob as he looked at Shadow/Knuckles porn.

Sorry I'm late.

Posted: Thu Nov 25, 2004 7:50 pm
by Grant
That brought tears to my eyes.

Beautiful.

Posted: Thu Nov 25, 2004 8:54 pm
by Baba O'Reily
I give it an 8.5/10

Posted: Thu Nov 25, 2004 9:59 pm
by Delphine
j-man wrote:That's not what your mum said last night when Zeta's boyfriend in a fox suit was fucking Popcorn's mum in the arse with a buttered bicycle handle while giving Baba a blowjob as he looked at Shadow/Knuckles porn.

Sorry I'm late.
I think I love you. <3<3<3

Posted: Thu Nov 25, 2004 11:44 pm
by plasticwingsband
Wow. That was brilliant.

Posted: Fri Nov 26, 2004 2:07 am
by -wyvern
...So much for being Gentle. Although Popcorn's mum certainly wasn't.

Posted: Fri Nov 26, 2004 2:58 pm
by j-man
YOSH!

Posted: Fri Nov 26, 2004 3:21 pm
by Spazz
<I><B>"</B>Holy Macaroni!<b>"</b></I>

Posted: Sat Nov 27, 2004 7:35 am
by -wyvern
Let's not get wierd.

Posted: Sat Nov 27, 2004 1:10 pm
by Locit
It's a bit late for that.

Posted: Sat Nov 27, 2004 3:32 pm
by Brazillian Cara
Cozinha.

Posted: Sat Nov 27, 2004 7:23 pm
by Zeta
"I'll buy that for a dollar!"

I was going to get offended on my boyfriend's account, but he thinks it was funny.