The GHZ Forum

Saw this on an old SA article. Thought this would make an interesting discussion.

Have at it.

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-I used to be under the impression that if my family drove it's four door car down a hill, with the doors open, the doors would act as wings, and allow it to fly.

-I was also into the whole 'if you eat a seed, you'll grow a watermelon in your belly' thing.

-A friend of mine convinced me that a long pipe sticking out of the ground in my neighborhood led to hell, and i'd always get scared around it.

-That in the movie theaters, that if you pulled the big-screen down, the actors/etc from the movie/cartoon would be standing there.

I always got China and Spain mixed up.

How the fuck?

I used to believe a woman's vagina was in-between her breasts. Silly me.

Redrappy wrote:I used to believe a woman's vagina was in-between her breasts. Silly me.

It's not?

I used to believe that in the days when my mother, father, and their families were young, everything was in black and white. I came to this conculsion because their old b&w photos.

Also, I used to believe that a woman becomes pregnant when she's "grown up"(and my idea of someone being grown up at the time was he/she in his/her late teens) through kissing a man a special way.

In another related thought, I used to believe that all babies were delivered by cutting a hole in the mother's stomach. It was mostly due to me and my younger brother being delivered by c-section.

cjmcray wrote:-I was also into the whole 'if you eat a seed, you'll grow a watermelon in your belly' thing.

Yep.

My brother explained the basic reproductive rules to me when I was about six (I think he was actually revising the scientific terms for his biology GCSE), but failed to mention you actually have to stimulate the penis. So for a fair while I thought when you wanted to make babies, the man and the woman stripped off, the man stuck the wang in, and they just sort of stood there waiting for a while.

Made for an interesting mental image.

Ngangbius wrote:I used to believe that in the days when my mother, father, and their families were young, everything was in black and white. I came to this conculsion because their old b&w photos.

Same here. Other then that, my beliefs were very typical: stuff like Tooth Fairies and Santa Claus. It was my little sister who believed in the more outrageous things, half the time because as an older sibling, I made up stories for her (Ex: I told my sister when she was in 7 at the time how my teacher always took me and my class on one of them Magic School Bus-ish field trips--she believed it hook, line, and sinker, it was beautiful).

I thought George Washington was the current president at the time- Abraham Lincoln followed soon afterward.

Also, for the longest time, I never quite got the whole concept of penetration during sexual intercourse, so I figured that you had to rub the naughty bits together to get the deed done. Made things a bit complicated once I hit puberty, as waggling my parts around never got me anywhere.

My aunt had one of those big coffee vats in her house, like the kind you use when you have a lot of people over, and she had me convinced that it was a coffee pot that she borrowed from a giant, and she'd periodically have a giant over for coffee.

Yeah, my imagination always got the better of me.

For a short while around kindergarten, I though 200 immediately followed 100, and so on. Everything up to 100 from 0 I had down, however.

When I was 13 I was pretty well convinced that I was the only person in the world who knew about masturbation and I was also worried that it's why my voice wouldn't change.

I believed Sonic in 3D was going to rock...

I thought that when my parents took me to see Santa, he was going to take me away to his workshop.

I thought that suicide would have been the solution to my bullying problem. Then i realised that i didn't actually have a problem.

I also believed that i was crazy because my parents did LSD while pregnant with me. I figured that somehow, my body was producing LSD itself.

I didn't realise that my dad smoked cannabis or that it was illegal until he told me around age 15. Until then, i figured it was some kind of flavouring.

Hippies for parents = AWESOME!

I used to believe that all babies were delivered by cutting a hole in the mother's stomach.

When I was 8 or 9 or so, a girl (and therefore a perfectly knowledgable source) told me that when a baby is born, the father has to reach up the mother's ass and pull the baby out.

Also around that time I thought that I could simulate what sex would be like by grabbing my penis firmly and peeing into my hand. It wasn't that great. After telling this story to a girlfriend, she looked at me seriously, as if I still believed it, and said "if you pee inside me, it's over."

the only person in the world who knew about masturbation

You know how when you go into Sex Ed and they tell you about all the changes that are going to happen to your body, and in particular they promise you sexy dreams and nocturnal emmissions! I never had a wet dream, and while I understand that waking up with your sheets stained with jizz for some reason you probably don't even remember isn't really all that great, I still felt sort of ripped off about it. It turns out that nocturnal emmission is caused because the seminal vasicule fills up over time and releases periodically while you're sleeping, and has absolutely nothing to do with what you dream about. So, when I explained to a knowlegable friend that I'd never had one, I'd also inadvertantly told him that I had been masturbating pretty much constantly since I was 11.

- Somehow I made up that I was the president of a country in another planet called Tracuba.

- I thought that when Superman was infected by kryptonite he would become Clark Kent.

- I knew sex was about a couple lying on top of each other rubbing themselves, but only that.

- I thought marriage was what made the woman become pregnant in some magical misterious way.

- I thought Hanna Barbera was a nice lady who drew all those cartoons frame by frame. And all cartoons were made in Brazil, since they were dubbed in portuguese.

Opa-Opa wrote: - I knew sex was about a couple lying on top of each other rubbing themselves, but only that.

I was always under the impression that sex was just two people kissing without clothes on, and in bed. I didn't know until 5th Grade that it involved more than just that..

And lol @ the Hanna-Barbara thing.

That if I wore sneakers with Sonic plastered on them, I could run as fast as him.

I used to think that it was possible for to become king of the world.

I used to think that cars got tired after moving for five minutes, so that's why they stopped sometimes. Some time later, I discovered traffic lights.

Only one I can really think of is that I thought the average human lifespan was 100 years.

I once thought that the Nightmare Before Christmas trees were somewhere on my property (as I live in a woodsy area).

And the existence of God.

I used to think I could control my dreams by figuring out I wasn't actually awake. I would always position something weird in my room before going to bed so that when I "woke up" I could check to see if it was still there. I did this off and on for a year before realizing that dreams didn't necessarily start with me in my room where I could check such things.

I was also told the word "fuck" meant gay sex by a friend that was two whole years older than me, so naturally I believed him for some time after that.

-I thought Sonic was a cat the first time I saw a commercial for the game and sometime after playing it.

-Everything was in black and white when my parents were kids.

-I was told sex was "a boy and a girl rolling around with one another with just their underwear on."

-I thought women just became pregnant from time to time.

-All wars were fought in American Revolutionary War, line formation. That and that the red coats were still America's creatist enemy.

-Animals had stuffed fluff inside them instead of organs.

-Babies would come out of a pregnant woman's butt after some time.

-I didn't know that "Mommy" was also "Mom" and "Daddy" was also "Dad". Made for some weird conversations when I would answer the phone.

-Everything was grown, like vegetables. Different movies, video games, and books were "discovered", not made.

-Micky Mouse was real.