Greetings from a self-appointed "Worst Ever Sonic Playe

[PRV]

I have been in the annoying position of both enjoying Sonic games and being no good at them for the past... let me see... could well be ten years, now I think of it. Well, not exactly, as it comes in two parts with a big gap in the middle. In the first part, the only Sonic game I actually played was Sonic 2 for the Mega Drive, where my record of only getting as far as Chemical Plant Zone Act 2 speaks for itself. I watched friends play and generally do significantly better, and then I lost interest for some time, disregarding Sonic for the likes of Micro Machines and my burgeoning collection of PC games.

It was only around three years ago that my interest in Sonic was rekindled, by a chance discovery whilst searching for (of all things) a MIDI version of the BBC Cricket theme. When I eventually found one, I found on the same website a version of the theme from my old nemesis, Chemical Plant Zone. On first listen, it didn't particularly strike any chords, but I grew more and more interested. On the advice of a friend, I found websites with all kinds of Sonic MIDIs, first from my home territory of Sonic 2, then from the other Sonic games.

It was around this time that the same friend also caught Sonic Nostalgia, and he dusted off his old Mega Drive. I wasn't bothered about playing: he and his brother were much better players than me (not difficult, as has been established), and so I just watched, and listened to the music. I was back in the game, if only as a spectator.

I became interested in not only listening to the Sonic MIDIs that people had made, but taking them apart, looking at what made them tick, fiddling with them, and attempting to write my own remakes (most of them either bad or "samey", although I'm proud of one version of the Labyrinth Zone tune that I made).

Then I went to Uni, and met someone who was absolutely crazy about Sonic. After several abortive attempts to try and tutor me in the early Sonic games (I can't even get past Green Hill Act 2 in Sonic 1. How pathetic is that?), we got on to the 3D ones, particularly Sonic Adventure, which I rather took to. In fact, I can safely say that Sonic Adventure, more exactly SADX, is the Sonic game that I'm best at (and it may even be something that breaks my claim to "Worst Ever Sonic Player". I'm actually better at it than several people, including the friend who reintroduced me to Sonic!). I eventually bought it for the PC, and in terms of emblems collected I'm about halfway, although I've still yet to finish the storylines of Sonic and Tails.

So, that brings me roughly up to date in terms of my story so far in the world of Sonic, except the fact that I've ended up here. Well, I've been hanging around the main website for a while, browsing through the Sonic Museum and stuff, and eventually I've ended up here. After a brief lurk, I decided to take the plunge. So, here I am, ready to take any accusations of being a newbie that may be hurled my way .

[Popcorn]

n00b

[plasticwingsband]

n00b

Oh schnyap!

[Spazz]

It's pretty interesting how many people from the UK/England we get on this forum. I've heard he's been pretty idolized up there (the Alton Towers toy ride, for example). I'm not suprised if Sonic becomes the new mascot/symbol for England in the [distant?] future.

n00b

Hahah, I saw that one coming.

[j-man]

There's a Sonic ride at Alton Towers? FUCK IT, why have my parents never cared enough to take me?

[Delphine]

Take yourself, you lazy ass. It's not like you need a plane ticket just to be in the same country with it.

[Green Gibbon!]

(the Alton Towers toy ride, for example)

What's Alton Towers? Is that what the 3D video in Sonic Jam was from?

[Guest]

Shit... I don't have enough money to go to Europe yet... DANG...

[Popcorn]

Alton Towers is a theme park here in the UK. Dunno if that 3D video's from there, but it seems unlikely... I never knew there was a Sonic ride at the place. I've never visited.

[Spazz]

There isn't a Sonic <i>ride</i> at Alton Towers, but there is a ride called "Toyland Tours" or something that features Sonic somewhere in there.

Ah, here we go:
"This Sega room has a huge console to your left and standing proud on this rather outmoded machine under a monitor is the ever-endearing Sonic the Hedgehog. On screens around the darkened room between golden hoops are snippets of Sonic and his computer capers."

[PRV]

Mind you, I've never been to Alton Towers, partly because, living in Wales, Oakwood Park is closer and pretty decent anyway (for the record, it boasts Megaphobia, "the world's largest wooden rollercoaster") and also because I've never particularly impressed by theme parks or rollercoasters.

Incidentally, there's one other Sonic-related thing you should know about me: I've never got the hang of saying "Eggman". It's always been Robotnik for me.

[j-man]

Take yourself, you lazy ass. It's not like you need a plane ticket just to be in the same country with it.

Dude, I have neither the time nor money, or the transport for that matter. I guess I'm just bitter than all my friends' parents took them when they were kids. Or they got to go on a school trip, the fuckers.

[The Scarlet Scorpion]

Hello, PRV. Welcome to The GHZ: Green Hill Zone! Free Drano is provided, and for an (exorbitant) fee they can hook you up with some Fired Pikachu. I hear it's the shiznit.

We also have free pornography, should you be so inclined, just clean up after you're done.

Remember, the power is yooooouuuurrrrs!

*T.S.S. shoots Captain Planet with his plasma cannon. After the fallout clears, he is seen shuddering.*

Never again.

Like I was saying, since you're the new guy, I figure I should warn you of Isambard, a.k.a. Dork, the resident Newbie Slayer. He's fought off Hordes of Trolls, squabled with Andy, the obnoxious British guitarist, and is the brother of "Golden Age" GHZer, Eternal Gamer. While all three of those guys are just lurkers now, they pop 'round from time to time to raise Cain a bit.

It's pretty interesting how many people from the UK/England we get on this forum. I've heard he's been pretty idolized up there (the Alton Towers toy ride, for example). I'm not suprised if Sonic becomes the new mascot/symbol for England in the [distant?] future.

I dunno, I may not be a Brit but I like to think that people may come and go, empires may be built and crumble, wars shall forever be waged... but whatever happens, "Doctor Who" will be there. No matter who or what's going to be around a thousand years in the future, the Doctor will still own the collective arse of evil.

Let's hope by then the novelists will get a grasp of continuity.

*T.S.S. clears his throat.*

Anyhow, if it makes you feel any better, I've had "Sonic the Hedgehog 3"/"Sonic & Knuckles"/"Sonic the Hedgehog 3 & Knuckles" for close to ten years now, and I still have yet to beat the game(s).

Oh, and about the whole Eggman/Robotnik thing: it took a long time for me to get used to it too, but I hear in "Sonic Adventure 2" they pretty much state that while Dr. Eggman is the name he terrorizes the world under, Dr. Ivo Robotnik is the name on his driver's liscense. There is no Mobius, though, and there never shall be, with any luck.

Okay, talking about the Eggman/Robotnik thing has got me thinking; I dare someone in the U.S. to ask for the F.B.I.'s file for "Dr. Ivo Robotnik". Hell, I might even do it myself, just to see how long it takes for them to realize he's a fictional character.

I can hear Bush now.

Perfect Chaos's attack on Station Square was due to faulty intelligence. I also didn't have anything to do that there Gerald Rotorooter, or Metal Overlord, either. Vote for me.

What? It's a video game?

Oh.





Vote for me.

I come from a long line of sarcastic Demacrats, what can I say?

Anyways, welcome to the team!

And yes, we really do have a lot of British posters here.





EDIT: Oops, a typo. I don't want to set a bad example, do I? After all, that's J.C. 14's department...

EDIT #2: Fixed another typo, then added the bit about "Mobius," and tweaked the Bush-bashing skit.

EDIT #3: More tweaking (you'd think I was George Lucas).

EDIT #4: And still more typos...

I think I've got 'em all, now, though.

[Baba O'Reily]

Nope. You spelled democrats wrong. Just here to nitpick.

[j-man]

Anyhow, if it makes you feel any better, I've had "Sonic the Hedgehog 3"/"Sonic & Knuckles"/"Sonic the Hedgehog 3 & Knuckles" for close to ten years now, and I still have yet to beat the game(s).

Carnival Night Zone?

[PRV]

Cheers for the welcome. I still think I'll stick to calling him Robotnik, on the basis that Jif's a better name than Cif, and Opal Fruits is a better name than Starburst (British posters will get my gist)

I suppose Sonic's fairly popular over here, but I think Britain's always liked its computer games, regardless of mascot (although I have a lot of friends at University with strong views on the Sonic/Mario debate, even after the characters' heyday. Ah, nostalgia... in fact, maybe nostalgia's the root cause: we're a nostalgic people)

[j-man]

I still think I'll stick to calling him Robotnik, on the basis that Jif's a better name than Cif, and Opal Fruits is a better name than Starburst (British posters will get my gist)

They're fucking MARATHON bars, dammit!!1

[The Scarlet Scorpion]

Nope. You spelled democrats wrong. Just here to nitpick.

Godfrey Daniels! I'll have to fix that (it was late when I posted it, and I was tired... be happy the post was coherent at all).

Anyhow, if it makes you feel any better, I've had "Sonic the Hedgehog 3"/"Sonic & Knuckles"/"Sonic the Hedgehog 3 & Knuckles" for close to ten years now, and I still have yet to beat the game(s).

Carnival Night Zone?

Yeah, that level's a real pain in the arse.

[j-man]

Bless.

[PRV]

Woo. With serious amounts of tutelage, and several snap-saves, I've managed to reach Marble Zone Act 3 in Sonic 1. This is approx. three times better than my previous PB of Green Hill Zone Act 2, so in relative terms it's a great improvement.

I've also now got more than half of the SADX emblems, bringing the total to 66 with a B- and A-Rank on Gamma's Final Egg.

EDIT: And now I've reached the lofty heights of Labyrinth Zone Act 3.

EDIT 2: The progress reports keep flooding in. B on Sonic's Windy Valley and A on Tails' Windy Valley and Icecap, bringing the total to 69.

EDIT 3: 71 emblems now (B and A on Amy's Hot Shelter). I've now completed Sonic 1, and have reached Oil Ocean Act 2 in Sonic 2. I probably don't deserve that title any more, though my progress seems to be more through effort than natural ability.