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Uh-oh, our first Douche Bag is angry

Posted: Mon Jul 19, 2004 10:57 pm
by Segaholic2
Haha. I don't check my admin@nathantsui.com e-mail address too often, but today I decided to, and was pleasantly surprised to find e-mail from our favorite Douche Bag.

For your entertainment:
Note: forwarded message attached.

Hello. My name is Carlos and before this incident I was Sonniku The Battousai (I left cause my AdultSwim account came back). Yesterday, I wrote to Jared a.k.a Green Gibbon about my situation concerning your message board under the presumption that he was the "head honcho", but to my suprise he isn't (you think you know s guy, huh?) Anyway, included in this message is a forwarded e-mail directed to Gibbon that explains my situation. But for your trouble, I'll just give you the hard facts: For months your Moderators have been giving me hell for absolutley no reason (especially that pmpous wench Delphine). And after fultily trying to reason with them, I left. But I came back cause I was bored and I wanted to see if I was banned when I SAW THIS:

"Sonniku The Battousai - Douche Bag I SUCK SO MUCH - PM ME FOR ANAL SEXXX"

At first I thought it was those stupid crack-heads trying to throw digital feces from their asses! But when I talked to Gibbon, I heard that only administrators could do such un-condolable actions..and he said he didn't do it. Which leaves me to you: Come to think of it, I belive we did met before. Don't you address yourself as a "God" of some sorts. Anyway, if the case is that someone has used your computer and/or your account to commit this heinous act, then I want to know who it is and I request that you delete my account. But if it was you, than I want a damn explanation as to why!!! And I'm not gonna give you a fucking night's sleep until I get my answer!!! I'm sorry we have to speak to each other under such circumstances, but you guys push me too far!!

Sign,
Carlos a.k.a Sonniku The Battousai
The only ones who could actually modify a user account like that would be administrators... normal mods don't have that control. The only administrators on the board are me and Segaholic, and it wasn't me who altered your account. The board and webspace are actually Segaholic's, so there's nothing I can tell him to do or not do... I'd recommend forwarding this message directly to him (admin@nathantsui.com). I'm sure he'd at least delete your account, or if he doesn't I'll do it, but speak with him first.
--
Green Gibbon!

----- Original Message -----
From: Carlos Abdu
To: greengibbon@emulationzone.org
Sent: Tuesday, July 13, 2004 8:08 PM
Subject: Your Three-Ring Circus of a Message Board


Hello. My name is Carlos Abdu. In your message board I was known as Sonniku The Battousai (though why I'm still on the board I don't know? I said to them I left months ago.) Anyway, for years I have respected your insight, opinions and knowledge concerning the Sonic games, and I may still do. But your lackes (i.e administrators and moderators) are beyond forgiveness. For weeks, your administrators have insulted me, mocked me, and threatened to ban me for the crime of...simply being myself. Especially that horrid wench Mrs. Delphine, who for reasons that escape my knowledge, despises me and my character. I have asked them to address their grievances and complaints, I have pleaded with them how we can settle our differances. But soon I grew tied of reasoning with a bunch of no class idiots (and I got my service on AdultSwim back), so I left the board. But if I may be bold:

WHO ARE THE MUTHER FUCKERS WHO HAVE WRITTEN DOUCHE BAG AND THE HORRIBLE AVATAR ABOUT "ANAL SEX" UNDER MY AVATAR?! DAMMIT YOU GIVE ME THEIR HEADS ON A PLATTER OR I WILL GET THE AUTHORITES AND MY LAWYERS ON YOUR ASS AND THREATHEN TO SHUT DOWN YOUR BOARD!!!

I apologize for those awefull words above, but I have a reason. I decided to come back today to see If I was banned or If I can get rid of my account. But then I SAW THAT ONE OF YOUR IDIOTIC MODS GAVE ME A RANK OF DOUCHE BAG AND UNDERNEATH, AN AVATAR ABOUT "HOW I SUCK SO MUCH AND PM ME FOR ANAL SEX"!!! MODS OR NOT, THAT IS AGAINST THE RULES, AND THEY SHOULD BE PUNISHED FOR THAT. Now I really would not want to do something I will regret and I respect you tremendously, but if you are going to allow this I will say that I will take action. Please respond by giving me some form of explanation, as well as the names of these ass..erm I mean hooligans. And if you do share their views but have some sort of reason, than just leave me alone and shut down my account. That it all. I hope we do not talk again under these circumstances. Thank You and Good Night

Sign,
Carlos Abdu a.k.a Sonniku The Battousai
E-Mail: KyoBogard2K3@aol.com
Kyobogard2k4@yahoo.com
AIM: Ed The Batosai

Posted: Mon Jul 19, 2004 11:11 pm
by Squirrelknight
Bwahahahaha.

It's funny when retards try to sound intelligent.

He seems to have gotten the idea that only us mods hate him... I'm pretty sure that everyone here hates him, even the newbies.

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2004 12:17 am
by Delphine
The day I am called a horrid, "pmpous" wench? Is a good day. XD

Although I'm not too particular to "Mrs." Delphine. I ain't got no attachments, fool boy.

Oh, and:
but if you are going to allow this I will say that I will take action.
What, is he going to get his internet lawyer? OH NOES!

ETA: Holic. You must change the line under my avatar to read "Horrid, Pmpous Wench", spelling mistake and all. If space does not permit, "Wench" will be fine. I DEMAND IT.

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2004 12:26 am
by Segaholic2
My reply below. I guess I really shouldn't have spent so much time writing it, but I wanted to cover everything to make sure he doesn't have any real reason to bother me again. And if he does, THEN I can rip him to shreds.
Sorry for the late reply; I don't check this e-mail account very often. I hope you didn't lose too much sleep trying to keep me from sleep, because I've been sleeping pretty well as of late, thanks for caring.

No, I don't think we've met before. And no, I don't refer to myself as a god or "God" of any sorts... That title was given to me by Green Gibbon! for my active position of head designer and administrator of the forum.

As for the whole Douche Bag business... Yes, I did that to you. It wasn't my brother or my friend or the invisible naked man in my closet. Why did I do such a horrible thing to such an innocent as you? Well, let's just say that it wasn't my idea. You'd made quite a few... "Enemies" (for lack of a better word) on the board in your short time there, to put it bluntly. (Incidentally, the board has only been in existence for around a couple of months, so I have no idea where you're getting this notion of being around for several months.) So yeah, I'm pretty neutral with these sorts of circumstances. The other members of the forum and a few of the mods were getting annoyed at your behavior, and frankly, I considered you a bit of a nuisance as well. You were fine when you weren't flaming or trolling or threatening other members of the board for no justifiable reason, but unfortunately for you that wasn't too often. I came to the decision to label you with "Douche Bag" after it was recommended to me by several members and mods, and after seeing this post:
http://www.nathantsui.com/ghzforum/view ... =4806#4806

That kind of idiocy was completely uncalled for, and is never appropriate anywhere, so I douched you. About the process... We (the admin/mod team) decided early on that in most cases we wouldn't bother trying to ban unruly members, as that would probably cause too much backlash and more trouble than was worth. Instead, we came up with the ingenious "Douche Bag" title for members we think deserve it. It doesn't change anything about your status as a member or your posting abilities or whatever. It's simply a label that's there to warn other members that maybe they don't want to read your posts, because Douche Bags are called that only because they earned it. Lucky you, turning out to be our first Douche Bag and everything.

There are no "rules" or "laws" or even "conventions" of how things should or must be done on the internet. What I'm trying to say is you're not going to get anywhere if you ever tried to contact any lawyers or whatever other nonsense you're thinking. Nobody's going to shut down my board, and I can do whatever I want on it, and you have no real right to complain.

There you have it. If you don't like it, bite me.

If you really want me to delete your account, I can do that for you, but it'll leave all your posts on the forum anyway, so I don't see any real reason to do that. I might remove the Douche Bag label if you started posting again and proved that you can be an intelligent and possibly friendly member of the community we have here. If not, then, we're not going to miss you much.

-Nathan Tsui

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2004 1:01 am
by Segaholic2
Dearest Del: Your request has been fulfilled.

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2004 1:17 am
by Delphine
*glee!* I think I love you.

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2004 6:44 am
by Popcorn
Can we make it so mods can alter avatars and titles? Please? Oh God please? You've no idea how happy it would make me. Us. All of us. We wouldn't abuse it or anything. Or anything.

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2004 12:13 pm
by Esrever
Yeah, Popcorn's right! Yeah, Popcorn! I agree with Popcorn!

What I find really upsetting is that, apparently, this Sonikku guy CAN write in complete sentences when he wants to... he just chose not to when he posted it here. I'm very insulted by that!

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2004 2:41 pm
by Segaholic2
Uh. I don't know if there's a mod for that, but I'll look into it, maybe. As of now, only admins have the power to alter avatars and titles.

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2004 5:39 pm
by Popcorn
If you don't look into it right now I'll ban you.

Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2004 9:33 pm
by Delphine
The obvious solution is to make us all admins.

Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2004 10:38 pm
by Segaholic2
Moved this topic to the main forum so the rest of you could partake in its hilarity.

And now, for the moment all of you have been waiting for...

J.C.14 IS OUR SECOND OFFICIAL DOUCHE BAG

Congratulations!

And if s/h/it wants some sort of explanation as to what it did to deserve this rank, then it's even stupider than I thought. Enjoy.

Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2004 10:42 pm
by Grant
This is pure comedic gold.

Thanks for moving it to the open forum.

P.S: Isn't this the same guy that threatened to "mac knive" me?

Pure gold.

Posted: Wed Sep 15, 2004 11:16 pm
by Zeta
I'm suprised it took that long to make J.C. # 2.

And on the subject of Sonniku the Battousai I love idiots who mix the names of two random and unrelated Japanese characters and cram them together into a single nonsensical screename.

For instance - "Sailor Spike" or "Vash the Cardcaptor" or "Super Saiyajin Hamtaro". You don't even need a douchebag label underneath their names. Their names already say it all.

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 12:26 am
by J.C.14
OMG, everybody look, I know get to have sex, yay!!! Thanks for making the Douche Bag thing :grin:

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 12:47 am
by Lakwren
It's not like anybody's going to want to have sex with you.

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 1:40 am
by Radrappy
oh. . .wow. . .I dont even remember this guy . . .but did anyone really deserve this kind of treatment? It's pretty funny but at the same time. . .kinda wrong. . . .

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 2:01 am
by J.C.14
Radrappy wrote:oh. . .wow. . .I dont even remember this guy . . .but did anyone really deserve this kind of treatment? It's pretty funny but at the same time. . .kinda wrong. . . .
Well, the people at the forum are mean, so meh

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 10:28 am
by Delphine
Well, now everyone knows where Horrid, Pmpous Wench came from, so they can STOP ASKING.

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 11:21 am
by Brazillian Cara
What's a wench? And what's a "mac knive"?
Man, I've got a feeling this guy isn't going to the forum for some time.

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 11:39 am
by Lakwren
Zeta wrote:I'm suprised it took that long to make J.C. # 2.

And on the subject of Sonniku the Battousai I love idiots who mix the names of two random and unrelated Japanese characters and cram them together into a single nonsensical screename.

For instance - "Sailor Spike" or "Vash the Cardcaptor" or "Super Saiyajin Hamtaro". You don't even need a douchebag label underneath their names. Their names already say it all.
I thought "Battousai" was just some word stupid Japanese wannabes use to look cool.

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 12:10 pm
by Ash Holt
What is he going to do? Sue you for slandering his fake name on an internet forum?

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 12:19 pm
by J.C.14
I don't like this

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 1:29 pm
by j-man
Ah, Mistress Delphine's title is explained, and in a humorous manner to boot. Mystery solved and laughs glean'd.

roflmao @ JC's classic avatar.

Oh yeah, and...
Brazillian Cara wrote:What's a wench?
Derogatory term for a member of the fairer sex. You can spit it to yo' bitch when she ain't puttin' out, if you desire.

Posted: Thu Sep 16, 2004 2:50 pm
by Segata
This is mean... not to mention hilarious.