Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Recent happenings of pertinence to Sonic fans.
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Wombatwarlord777
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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Wombatwarlord777 »

I've said it before and I'll say it again: What an insult to what the series formerly was.

Also, on-rails gameplay = One sad, sad panda. I could have sworn it wasn't so beforehand, but I got that information from Wikipedia, so I guess I don't have anyone to blame but myself.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by FlashTHD »

What, the hell. Does Sonic's momentum really grind to a near-halt like that any time you jump?

And soundtrack CDs:
http://info.sonicretro.org/Sonic_and_th ... o_Faith%22
http://info.sonicretro.org/Sonic_and_th ... ghthood%22

Oh boy, something else it has in common with 06 (and the Shadow game): divvied up soundtracks. The lovingly engrish Face to Faith is the vocal trax with a couple remixes from Lee Brotherton and (guh) Crush 40, and Tales of Knighthood is two discs and 68 tracks of some of the silliest song titles ever:
10. Knave The Hedgehog and Oversized Letter Opener
24. Sir Gawain Appear - Butt Rap Mix -
Yeah.

And unless someone's gone and vandalized that page, Howard Drossin was attached to this. WHY. I mean he foreshadowed that he'd compose for the series again, but.

WHY.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Dr. BUGMAN »

This truly is the culture of mediocrity. The kids that grew up thinking Sonic Heroes is enjoyable also grew up with whatever the Disney Channel and Nickelodeon devolved into. Also, High School Musical. Some people are actually defending this abonimation. Sonic is Zac Efron*.

I'm glad I was around for the late eighties/early ninties when anything and everything was marketable. It was ill-avised, but at least the absurdity of what was marketed to us didn't stunt creative, abstract thought--one might say that it facilitated it.


*I really wish I didn't know who that was
Last edited by Dr. BUGMAN on Mon Mar 09, 2009 9:53 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Protodude
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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Protodude »

Wow, the jumping sound is really bizarre in this game and his model looks kind of jerky at some parts.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by FlashTHD »

Protodude wrote:Wow, the jumping sound is really bizarre in this game and his model looks kind of jerky at some parts.
You ain't kidding. Twitch twitch twitch twitch *dash panel*twitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitch!

Plus, the slowest, cheapest Homing Attack yet (after one jump dash he seems to plummet at light speed back into the ground), and did they up and suddenly forget about that lock-on marker they seemed to want to keep using, or what? If it weren't as fun to imagine that the team behind this was that inept, i'd say this smells of another rush-rush-out-ze-door spectacular.

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Kogen
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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Kogen »

That was honestly funny to watch. The homing attack looks about as useless as the one in the Rush games.

How can they make a game so jerky like that? And since when is Sonic Heroes the Sonic Legacy?

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Wombatwarlord777 »

Where are the loop-de-loops and palmtrees?! Legacy Mode my arse.

Also, concerning that video, is there any chance the jerky model is due to low video quality (I imagine not)?

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by FlashTHD »

Wombatwarlord777 wrote:Also, concerning that video, is there any chance the jerky model is due to low video quality (I imagine not)?
No. Hit high quality on the Titanic Plains one.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Dasher »

Iizuka thinks hes a god and Sonic heroes is his law as it was his first abomination.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by P.P.A. »

I saw YouTube comments calling those Sonic Heroes robots "the old enemies". :PB:

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Wombatwarlord777 »

Sadly, that makes some sort of perverse sense. In the eyes of the "13 year-olds who first played SA2B" group, Sonic Heroes is the second entry in the entire series.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Kogen »

These kids are extremely stupid. I see a lot of them say SA2 is the first good Sonic game and that Sonic belongs on Nintendo. They are not really Sonic or SEGA fans, just Nintendo queer kids who like Shadow and Archie comics.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Rob-Bert »

..."Nintendo queer kids"?

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Neo
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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Neo »

I think he's not allowed to say "fanboy" due to a contractual agreement.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Xyton »

So I rented this and beat it somewhere between two and three hours. o_O Overall, it's just kinda… there. It's not maddeningly bad (i.e. Unleashed night stages), but it's not particularly good, either. Story doesn't really go anywhere, graphics are pretty good, waggle will hurt your wrist after a while, music is just kinda there. <shrug> So I guess I'd say don't avoid it, but don't seek it out unless you really like Sonic and the Secret Rings.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Kogen »

So an entirely pointless entry into the series. Super~

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Xyton
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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Xyton »

Oh, and apparently Eggman is nowhere to be found. I certainly didn't run into him. That seems odd; did anyone find him?

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Kogen
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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Kogen »

He is not on the character page.

To me, Eggman seems like the obvious choice for the blacksmith, though. His mustache would fit into the medieval look. Tails should have just been who Blaze is (that character is a male, I thought?). The designers are idiots.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Wombatwarlord777 »

Eggman's not in the game, from what I've heard. I wouldn't be surprised if there's some concept art of him as an unlockable or something...

And the designers ARE idiots! Eggman would've made a great, insane court jester, spouting off crazy tales of how a woodland critter manages to stop his armies of steam-powered tinmen. That would've provided some great comic relief to this somewhat serious story.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by FlashTHD »

Behold: TETSU KATANO CONFESSES HIS SINS (sort of)
This time I was Producer slash Director. It was around this time when we finally started to see the end of “Sonic and the Secret Rings” after a sequence of sleepless nights that my boss came up to me and casually dropped on me the newss that it would be up to me to think of an idea for “the next one (in the Storybook series)“.

After much struggle that gave me both pain and joy, I finally decided to throw Sonic into a world of sword and magic. I confess that I’ve always wanted to see Sonic holding a sword. I also wanted to see Knuckles or Shadow, the usual suspects, back as strong foes, not just as side characters. This is how the plot of “Sonic and the Black Knight” came into a shape.

Perhaps most challenging was to make Sonic have a sword. I had to hold on to the Sonicness. If he loses that as a result of having sword, then it would be preposterous.
Just a bit late, dude.
I sought advice from many people about this. My favourite bit would be when everyone in Sonic Team started to see the great game that this was becoming. I am proud of this game and I will be most happy if users will enjoy this game too.

Not to mention Sonic’s sword, actually this game has a big shift in its main attitude. Normally Sonic is about collecting rings and speed dash to the goal. But this time these are not the only objectives in the game. Of course it’s exhilarating if you can reach the goal fast, but in this game, every other cool action is taken into account in the scoring.
Barring the chance of mistranslations, special attention must be paid to the parentheses after "the next one". Nice to hear that corporate climate seems to still be sandpaper-rough.

What do you think? Sympathy, apathy, burn at the stake? And hey, since he took both the director and producer chairs, where did Ogawa fit into this, if at all?

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Xyton
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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Xyton »

Wombatwarlord777 wrote:That would've provided some great comic relief to this somewhat serious story.
Think about what you just said. :P

I agree with your point, though; seems wrong not to have him in there somwhere.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by DackAttac »

FlashTHD wrote: What do you think? Sympathy, apathy, burn at the stake?
I certainly wouldn't want that poor bastard's job. Go into this project with a knowingly mismatched staff and time budget (as per normal) and the requirement of making the game's premise un-Sonic-y by definition. I'll be honest, though, if he was using the sword as a red herring to pawn the Wii waggle shit off on to bring control back to the joystick, brilliant move. It's just a shame that none of these levels look like they're worth moving around in freely.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by gr4yJ4Y »

FlashTHD wrote:Plus, the slowest, cheapest Homing Attack yet (after one jump dash he seems to plummet at light speed back into the ground)
There was a move you could use in Secret Rings where Sonic would drop to the ground suddenly. They might have brought that back. I couldn't see what you were talking about in that video though.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by Arcade »

As a guy who has played a lot of videogames that use swords, and as a Samurai Jack fan, isnt that "cheapest Homing Attack yet" a standard sword move?. OF course I hope Sonic uses the sword to do it, othewise, that move just sucks.

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Re: Sonic and the Quest for Phallic Compensation

Post by FlashTHD »

Arcade wrote:As a guy who has played a lot of videogames that use swords, and as a Samurai Jack fan, isnt that "cheapest Homing Attack yet" a standard sword move?. OF course I hope Sonic uses the sword to do it, othewise, that move just sucks.
Ignoring your bi-monthly malformed abortion of logic, it's "cheapest Homing Attack yet" as in "looks even more pitifully slow, tedious and flow-jarring than the Sonic 06 Homing Attack".

And mad props to Slingerland at Sonic Stadium for this slam fuckin' dunk - he takes Katano's asessment that Black Knight is aimed more towards little kids head-on, and in the process finds 3 kids who've never touched a Sonic game before, but have the good sense to see a polished turd for what it is...if the game can even be called that. Yet still, I want to feel a little sorry for Katano - when he did that thing for the Sega blog, it seemed almost like he deliberately (warning: pelt-with-objects moment approaching) fell on his sword for something.

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