Weird Things you believed as a child.

[Omni Hunter]

-I used to believe that on rare occasions, my wardrobe would open into Bucky o'Hare's anniverse.

-I remember going through the whole puberty thing and it really fucking scared me, I never realy got the explanation until I was in my late-ish teens, and I thought that I was mentally ill before then.

-I used to run around collecting change from the floor and when I got £1 I would hum the Sonic 1-up jingle and declare I had an extra life.

[Opa-Opa]

-I used to run around collecting change from the floor and when I got £1 I would hum the Sonic 1-up jingle and declare I had an extra life.

Amazing. I never had associated one thing to the other. I think I'll start doing that.

[Oompa Star]

- I believed that women peed from their butts.

- I was convinced that all babies were delivered by cutting open the mothers stomach.

- I thought that there was a shark in the pond in my backyard.

- When I first played Sonic 2, I thought Eggman's name was Beavis. I have no idea why.

[Shadow Hog]

- I believed that women peed from their butts.

On that subject, when I was younger, I was aware that women had "two holes"; I then surmised that women peed two streams at once.

[Vector]

I thought that babies were made by the parents laying next to each other and invisible particles jumping between their hips.

Due to my mom making some comments about obscene music I had the idea that EVERY "rock and roll" song was somehow wrong and would worry about getting caught watching, say, Muppet Babies.

By spreading my arms with my jacket as wings, I thought that if one found just the right angle, you could use it as a parachute or even glide.

I imagined the difference between sexes as what clothes they wore and acting out a stereotype.

Even though I knew better I was always a bit nervous that just maybe there was a giant wolflike monster hiding in dark rooms in the house or a shark in the deep end of the pool.

[j-man]

I used to think "fart" was a swear word.

I also figured that "getting drunk" just meant you'd get sleepy and hiccup a lot (which isn't all that wrong, really). I thought there was only one kind of alcohol, beer, and that it would just taste a bit like orange juice.

My mum always used to tell me not to put too much salt on my dinner, otherwise I'd get "high blood pressure". I thought this meant that if I literally put one grain too many on my plate, I'd suddenly swell up, all turgid like a fucking giant boner, and my veins would all simultaneously explode. I was fucking frightened, man.

Speaking of boners, I can remember getting them from a fairly early age, and as such I had no clue why it happened, or for what purpose. I used to think you had to squeeze it to make it go away, and no, not like that.

I used to hate my brother leaving games on the title screen for ages, because I thought if you left it too long the game would get pissed off and refuse to let you play it, or blow up or something.

I used to think I could jump out of my window and use a blanket to safely parachute me down. Never tried, thank God.

[gr4yJ4Y]

I also used to think that men and women just had different organs and otherwise acted the way they were because of the stereotypes.

[Neo]

When I first played Sonic 2, I thought Eggman's name was Beavis. I have no idea why.

I used to say Casino Night's boss was Eggman's mom.

I also called Mecha Sonic 'Iron Sonic'.

[Opa-Opa]

I thought Earnest Evans was a robot.

[G.Silver]

My brother couldn't pronounce "Luigi" for some reason so we called him "Ravioli" instead.

[Light Speed]

We had weird names for lots of things in the Sonic universe. Since we didn't have the internet we just sorta made up names. The speed power up was quick shoes, springs were called bungies, the shields were called wongs cause of the sound they made when you got them. Not really weird things I believed as a kid, but yeah.

[Locit]

I always called them "speed shoes."

I assumed raccoons had some sort of ability to go airborne for a short period of time because of the tanuki suit in Super Mario 3. Not fly, mind you, buy maybe glide a little.

[Neo]

Rings, shields, sneakers, stars, lives. Nothing too weird. I used to call them all TVs, though, I didn't learn the term 'monitor' until I got my first computer in 1997.

I remember my family asking if Knuckles was a dog, and I'd bitterly respond he was an echidna. Minutes later they were calling him an 'echidina', an 'echadina' and a 'squirrel'.

[gr4yJ4Y]

Me and my family would call the continues "little guys" because of their chibi Sonic like appearance.

[Rob-Bert]

I didn't have any Sonic games when I was little, but my family and I would make stuff up about the Mario games. The Mushroom was "Big", the Fire Flower was "Bullets", Koopa Troopas were "Ducks", Buzzy Beetles were "Helmets" and Bowser was "The Dragon".

If he couldn't figure out what something was supposed to be, my grandfather would call it 'This/that guy". When I first saw a Fuzzy. I called it an "eighty-eighty", since that's what it looked like it was saying when it moved it's mouth.

When my grandmother and I played DKC, we called the enemies by whatever species they were, and I erroneously thought the Kremlings were "alligators", and my grandmother called the Neckies "eagles".

[Delphine]

I imagined the difference between sexes as what clothes they wore and acting out a stereotype.

Well, before puberty, that's mostly accurate.

Our neighborhood was at the top of a hill, and my street was a dead end. I used to think that the entire world was like that -- a series of small hills with dead ends.

I thought a penis was a really tiny leg.

Due to my mother's uber-Christianity, I used to think that if you went high enough in the sky you would reach Heaven and that if you dug low enough you would reach Hell. I figured you could dig to China if you were real careful and went around Hell.

I imagined the big bang as god setting off a giant stick of dynamite.

[Vector]

Not just before puberty, but in general. Sure I had the idea that moustaches and pregnancy were gender-specific, but had no idea why. I'm not sure exactly when I realized otherwise, but I know I was conscious of it when some school counselor was talking about kids suddenly learning there's a difference and acting immature, and I consciously just clicked. "There's a difference? Oh yeah I guess so." And I couldn't remember when I figured it out, but was surprised that I wasn't surprised, even though I had no idea what the supposed difference was.

I also used to think that men and women just had different organs and otherwise acted the way they were because of the stereotypes.

That's much closer to true than people tend to think.

[Black Rook]

- I believed that women peed from their butts.

I believed this as well.

During middle school (long after I'd learned that the above wasn't true), I did manage to convince a classmate that women pissed and pooped from the same hole. After a few "NUH UUUHH"s, he ended up thinking it was true.

I lost touch with him soon after that. I wonder if he still thinks that.

[One Classy Bloke]

I imagined the big bang as god setting off a giant stick of dynamite.

That reminds me, i used to think that the big bang was cause by God and Jesus playing conkers.

[Rob-Bert]

I used to think that thunderstorms were caused by angels bowling.

[Heroic One]

I assumed if you didn't get out of the bathroom before the roaring noise a toilet makes after it flushes you'd be eaten by the monsters making those noises.

On 9/11, for whatever reason I thought the World Trade Tower was the Washington Monument, and all day I was baffled how a big stone tower killed people.

[Oompa Star]

I also believed that dinosaurs still walked the earth and that human beings only lived in the U.S.

[Shadow Hog]

I remember that whenever I was in Ice Cap Zone and I met those penguin robots, my little sister would like to say "Penguin alert! Penguin alert!"

Of course, now that we're both older and debatably wiser, that doesn't happen anymore...

[Samface]

I used to think buttercups tasted of butter, and would sit in the garden eating them. They never tasted of butter, of course, but I presumed you had to eat them in a certain way and I just had to figure out what that way was.

The epilogue to this story? The other day, a ladybird flew into my mouth, and it tasted exactly like buttercups.

[EmeraldGuardian]

I used to think Jesus was hiding inside the communion table or the church basement.

Also that when Knuckles was on the edge of a cliff in the old games, you could see his penis as he swayed his arms.

...Plus ejaculation in my sleep when I was very young. I thought I was accidentally wetting myself until I had my first "conscious" orgasm and realized what it was.