Do whatever you want, just leave Mario out of this!

Locit · Post by **Locit** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 3:02 am

For anyone that doubts the propaganda-esque nature of Nintendo Power, let this Star Fox 64 promotional video be your downfall.

I'd forgotten this video's existence until yesterday. But that's not important. What is important is that by the end of the video the two Nintendo employees have gone insane and begin taunting "SEGA" and "SONY" with the official strategy guide. "You can buy it in stores" notes scientist Steve.

If Sony and Sega want Star Fox 64, what hope do we mere mortals have? It's like they were pumping liquid propaganda into their subscribers' eyes. Priceless. If anyone has the Pokemon counterpart video wherein Ash's 'real life' family members are interviewed I would be eternally grateful.

Heroic One · Post by **Heroic One** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 6:08 am

Ah, the 90's.

Isambard · Post by **Isambard** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 10:16 am

Regardless of whether or not Nintendo Power is a Nintendo puppet (which is not coming into question here); the real problem is the people who read the magazines that are supposed to watchdog the franchises they're supporting.

If you make a car and that car sucks you can buy a magazine company and have them print a review about how awesome your car is. But the fallout is when people buy the car, hate it, boycott the magazine and go to another car company for transportation. If the magazine company writes a fair and honest review of the car then people go in armed with the proper knowledge and some people may love it and some people may hate it. But people will respect your magazine first and foremost. So they may not by -this- car, but they might buy the next one if the review suits their tastes.

It's all about viral marketing, which is something you can't just create out of thin air. So for Nintendo to say crap games are good is just a pulling back the hammer on the proverbial gun that's aimed at their proverbial foot.

Plus who the hell doesn't love a competitive game market? We get tons of breaks and the companies try hard to get our attention. And yea, you can buy it in stores. Doesn't mean you gotta...

Zeta · Post by **Zeta** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 2:11 pm

In their defense, StarFox 64 really did kick ass.

chriscaffee · Post by **chriscaffee** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 4:33 pm

Dude. Steve is the test pilot. Bob is the scientist. My favorite part is that this is a video aimed at kids yet it teaches them such important lessons about industrial espionage, incapacitation through drug soaked rags and chemical weapons, and finally information extraction through torture.

I also like how they call spinning a "barrel roll."

Oh yeah and the best part:

Bob: Steve, you didn't tell them about... the Rumble Pack did you?

Sony: No, Bob, you just did.

Bob: I did?

Steve: You did.

Sony: Spill it.

Steve: Make me.

Sony: With pleasure. Look at your plumber boy now!

Oh yeah and don't forget...

Thanks for the pizza, guys!

See you later, boys!

VGJustice · Post by **VGJustice** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 10:29 pm

Holy crap, I think I own that tape.

Light Speed · Post by **Light Speed** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 11:33 pm

I think I've seen that before somewhere strangely enough.

Yami CJMErl · Post by **Yami CJMErl** » Thu Jan 18, 2007 11:27 am

Heh, I used to own a tape a while back that advertised Donkey Kong 64 and another game, "Gemeni Star" or something like that. Lost it a while ago, but it got me pumped for DK64, that's for sure.

Zeta · Post by **Zeta** » Thu Jan 18, 2007 12:10 pm

Jet Force Gemini. The most underated shooter ever.

j-man · Post by **j-man** » Thu Jan 18, 2007 12:24 pm

Because it was shit.

Shadow Hog · Post by **Shadow Hog** » Thu Jan 18, 2007 1:21 pm

chriscaffee wrote:I also like how they call spinning a "barrel roll."

Don't diss the barrel roll. Else we'll have Nintendo going all "Oh god they're using our barrel roll, oh god, they're making f'd-up jokes about the barrel roll" and stuff.

Zeta · Post by **Zeta** » Thu Jan 18, 2007 4:46 pm

Because it was shit.

Oh yeah?! Well, you can just go to heck and sit there! SO THERE.

VGJustice · Post by **VGJustice** » Thu Jan 18, 2007 9:35 pm

Shadow Hog wrote:
chriscaffee wrote:I also like how they call spinning a "barrel roll."
Don't diss the barrel roll. Else we'll have Nintendo going all "Oh god they're using our barrel roll, oh god, they're making f'd-up jokes about the barrel roll" and stuff.

It's a snap roll anyway.

plasticwingsband · Post by **plasticwingsband** » Sat Jan 20, 2007 5:13 pm

I used to own this on VHS. It is awesome, and SF64 is the shit.

Team Mecha · Post by **Team Mecha** » Mon Jan 22, 2007 9:48 pm

So is Star Fox Assault, just minus the "the".

I still got this tape as well as the Diddy Kong Racing, Banjo Kazooie, Hot Newz (JFG & DK64) & Ubi-Soft tapes. Supposeably, there's also 1 for DKC but that was before I started my NP subscription.

Zeta · Post by **Zeta** » Mon Jan 22, 2007 9:56 pm

So is Star Fox Assault, just minus the "the".

The single player is. However, if you want Halo but don't want to buy a Microsoft console, SFA's multiplayer is a pretty good substitute.

Post by **Segaholic2** » Mon Jan 22, 2007 10:22 pm

Zeta wrote:The single player is. However, if you want Halo but don't want to buy a Microsoft console, SFA's multiplayer is a pretty good substitute.

No it's not.

Tsuyoshi-kun · Post by **Tsuyoshi-kun** » Tue Jan 23, 2007 1:31 pm

Not a good substitute for Halo, or not a good game? I don't play Doom clones.

Post by **Segaholic2** » Tue Jan 23, 2007 2:06 pm

It's not a good substitute for Halo, and it's not even a good game period. It is displeasurable in every respect and I am annoyed to have ever played it.

Tsuyoshi-kun · Post by **Tsuyoshi-kun** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 5:08 am

So it's essentially a cash-in game from Namco for Star Fox fans? It seems like Namco has been doing nothing BUT rehashes recently.

One Classy Bloke · Post by **One Classy Bloke** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 8:37 am

Namco is a company which deserves no respect really. They systematically destroy good franchises, both of their own and others companies (granted, Rare did get a heads start on Star Fox).

j-man · Post by **j-man** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 12:08 pm

For me, Namco started and ended with Soul Calibur. Not just in, like, some bitchy fanboy "they ruin franchises" school-of-thought way. I mean, I was totally unaware of their existence beforehand and am now not even sure they still exist.

Oh yeah wait, Tekken. But I can just about forgive them for that.

Locit · Post by **Locit** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 12:17 pm

Also Katamari Damacy.

Tsuyoshi-kun · Post by **Tsuyoshi-kun** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 2:00 pm

Until the PSP game, that is. Who green-lighted THAT idea?

CE · Post by CE » Wed Jan 24, 2007 2:32 pm

Your denial of PacMan's existence has caused him to fall into a deep depression.