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The New Commandments

Posted: Mon Mar 27, 2006 10:13 pm
by Green Gibbon!
I have long avoided posting a strict set of guidelines for the forum because I don't want to be anyone's fucking nanny. I think you should be able to post whatever you want as long as you observe a certain level of common sense and common courtesy. Unfortunately, it has become increasingly apparent that most people - or at least the ones who choose to post here - do not possess these cognitive facilities. As such, in order to maintain a certain level of integrity, I've compiled a list of posting guidelines that will henceforth be enforced.

First, a recap of the original forum rules. Enforcement up to this point has been extremely lax, but the anarchist regime is over:

Proper grammar is a requirement.
We're not English majors (well, most of us aren't), so you won't be chastised for misspelling and occasional grammatical errors. But you should make an honest attempt at writing coherent sentences with proper capitalization and at least basic punctuation. Sentences that lack structure are an eyesore and difficult to read. Such posts will be deleted even if your topic is relevant, because there isn't anyone here who will have the patience to interpret your bastardization of the language. (Leniency will be shown on non-native speakers so long as they appear to know what the hell they're talking about.)

Do not start a topic to introduce yourself.
In the physical world, it's common courtesy to state your name and your business when meeting new people. In the lawless land of anarchy that is the internet, it's generally more acceptable to worm your way into a community gradually through active participation. Threads containing introductory messages and nothing else ("hi, I'm new and I'll be posting here from now on") will be deleted.

Spam: it's not just for lunch (but it should be).
If you have something to say, go for it. If you do not have something to say, don't say anything. It's simple. The conflict occurs when people think they have something to say, but actually don't. When they give in to these misguided urges, the result is spam.
I admit that rule #3 regarding spam is particularly vague because that's a very broad subject. However, based on observations of this forum, I've pinpointed some recurring problems. I won't toss names around (yet), but a quick glance over the resulting commandments should tell you whether or not you're an offender:

Thou shalt not reference outside material without posting thoughts of thy own.
A firsthand opinion is always better than something that you read somewhere else, and if you're citing an outside article to answer a question, maybe you don't really have the answer and should refrain from posting. If you choose to reference an outside review, it is absolutely forbidden to mention a numeric score. No "Game Informer gave it a 67%" or "IGN gave it an 8.3", or "Famitsu gave it a 7, 7, 7, 9." This is not information. Citing specific comments from the article is fine, but do not cut and paste the entirety, or even direct link to it unless you have an argument or commentary that consists of more than an ambiguous approval or disagreement.

Thou shalt not post one-line reviews.
If you're going to create a new thread to discuss a game / movie / album / comic that you liked, make sure you actually discuss the media in question. No "this movie kicks ass, you all need to watch it." If that's really all you have to say, post your singular thought on Amazon's customer review list.

Thou shalt not feed the trolls.
Make use of the "Ignore" button. If you read a post that is irrelevant, it will be deleted by a moderator. If you feel it necessary to waste additional space by voicing your disapproval of the message in question, it will also be deleted. Likewise, do not un-ignore a user only to re-ignore him and create an additional message to let everyone know that you went through this process.

Thou shalt not use the forum as thy personal blog.
Do not start a thread to discuss recent events from your personal life. Relevant quips and/or amusing anecdotes are welcome, but if you're just going to babble about what you did over the weekend or boo-hoo over your lost love, take it somewhere else. This isn't a teen hotline.

Thou shalt not link to webcomics in place of a reply.
Absolutely no linking to individual webcomic strips, regardless of how relevant they may be to the conversation.

Thou shalt not link to flash movies.
Absolutely no linking to flash movies of any kind, regardless of how funny or clever you think the clip in question is.

Thou shalt not advertise thy shit.
"Shit" in this context can refer, but is not limited to, any of the following articles: website, webcomic, fan game, fan art, fanfic, blog, or eBay auction. If you have work that you'd like critique on, there is a long-standing forum topic for that purpose. (If there's enough demand for it, a separate critique board may be established down the line.)

Thou shalt not state the bloody fucking obvious.
In the name of all that is intelligent and right with the world, do not ever use the phrase "in my opinion," "in my humble opinion," "in my personal opinion," or any of the acronyms used to represent such verbiage. We know it's your goddamn opinion.

Thou shalt be relevant, amusing, or silent.
You do not have to reply to every single thread. If you have no relevant or at least amusing observations to bring to the table, just don't post anything. Note that a simple "yeah, that's so true" or "I heard that game sucked" does not constitute a relevant observation. A general rule of thumb is to look at the length of your message: if it consists of one sentence or less, think twice before hitting "post reply".


That list isn't all-inclusive, and articles will be added or removed as needed. All commandments will be enforced based on the judgment of whichever moderator happens to review your post - and your post will likely be reviewed by a large number of moderators. If you find that your messages are frequently deleted, it probably means that you're an idiot, in which case there are hundreds - nay, thousands - of other online message boards you can migrate to.

Posted: Mon Mar 27, 2006 10:27 pm
by Segaholic2
Welcome back, everyone.

Show me how you want it to be.

Posted: Mon Mar 27, 2006 11:01 pm
by DackAttac
And he descended from the mountain with two stone tablets.

And a rogue voice from the crowd proclaimed, "Hey, dumbass, he posted them online."

And he replied, "Yeah, well... fuck you."


It's good to be back. Kind of like when you don't take a dump for a really long time, and then get to relieve yourself. Or like making a shitty analogy, for that matter.

Re: The New Commandments

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 8:51 am
by Tsuyoshi-kun
Green Gibbon! wrote: If you choose to reference an outside review, it is absolutely forbidden to mention a numeric score. No "Game Informer gave it a 67%" or "IGN gave it an 8.3", or "Famitsu gave it a 7, 7, 7, 9." This is not information. Citing specific comments from the article is fine, but do not cut and paste the entirety, or even direct link to it unless you have an argument or commentary that consists of more than an ambiguous approval or disagreement.
Ah, this made my day. Seriously, anyone who relies on numerical rating systems to determine if a game is good or not are a bunch of dumbshits. Granted, I'm part of an anime review site that gives anime star ratings from 1 to 5, but I don't expect people who read them to only go by the number of stars something has. Hey, I gotta make those other five or six paragraphs going over each individual thing in an anime I review actually mean something. Otherwise, why write anything more than a number?

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 12:34 pm
by Owen Axel
Damn, I like hearing "in my opinion" from folks. It's nice after dealing with so many morons who aren't aware that their opinion is in fact an opinion and not an established scientific fact.

I know there's no such thing as a scientific fact, it's just that...fuck.

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 12:58 pm
by Omni Hunter
So that's the scope for the new rules. They look prety beneficial for the forum I guess, although some look a bit familiar.

One question though, does the 10th commandment apply to the Post your picture thread? Because some of the work is generally fan-art or part of personal projects.

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 1:34 pm
by G.Silver
I think we're allowed to get away with it there.
GG! wrote:If you have work that you'd like critique on, there is a long-standing forum topic for that purpose.

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 2:24 pm
by Esrever
In my opinion, these rules get a 4 out of 7.

Re: The New Commandments

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 2:25 pm
by Light Speed
Tsuyoshi-kun wrote:
Green Gibbon! wrote: If you choose to reference an outside review, it is absolutely forbidden to mention a numeric score. No "Game Informer gave it a 67%" or "IGN gave it an 8.3", or "Famitsu gave it a 7, 7, 7, 9." This is not information. Citing specific comments from the article is fine, but do not cut and paste the entirety, or even direct link to it unless you have an argument or commentary that consists of more than an ambiguous approval or disagreement.
Ah, this made my day. Seriously, anyone who relies on numerical rating systems to determine if a game is good or not are a bunch of dumbshits. Granted, I'm part of an anime review site that gives anime star ratings from 1 to 5, but I don't expect people who read them to only go by the number of stars something has. Hey, I gotta make those other five or six paragraphs going over each individual thing in an anime I review actually mean something. Otherwise, why write anything more than a number?
Well yes and no. I agree you should have something more than just a number, but I don't think the number system is as evil as you guys make it out to be. At a quick glance it gives a general overview of how whoever wrote the review felt about the game. Sure it doesn't mention what parts are good or bad, but I don't think we should be totally forbidden from referencing a review score. I also don't think it is necessary to give a game a score if you are writing your thoughts on a game. I'm just saying I don't think a post that talks about a websites review and then mentions the score it gave the game is grounds for deletion.

Re: The New Commandments

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 2:33 pm
by Delphine
Light Speed wrote:I don't think the number system is as evil as you guys make it out to be.
Of course it isn't. The fact that people will base their opinion and their entire argument on it, however, is.

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 4:15 pm
by Tsuyoshi-kun
I think a number rating is useful to some extent at deciding if a game is pruchase worthy or not, but unfortunately, some video gamers use that very same number as a substitute for playing the game, and I don't like that idea at all (especially when you consider how biased certain magazines are against certain games. Nintendo Power, anyone).

One of the biggest examples I can think of disagreeing with magazines reviews was when everyone gave glowing reviews to Yoshi's Island. For 8 years I heard it was the best Mario game ever (and on these forums, still do), and found out the hard way to not give my hopes up. I have very similar feelings to every Zelda game prior or after Ocarina of Time, the only Zelda game I can honestly say I like.

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 4:29 pm
by Popcorn
This is just a quick note to say that my PC has recently exploded, and so I won't be making my presence known for a while yet, but rest assured that my profound anger has not yet subsided and that as soon as I get back you're all in big trouble.

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 4:30 pm
by DarkPrime
I'm glad to see the forum back. I was beginning to get worried that something went wrong.

Is the logo up top new?

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 4:43 pm
by Locit
All I know is the text boxes now have an extra-bold outline. Classy!

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 4:46 pm
by Light Speed
DarkPrime wrote:I'm glad to see the forum back. I was beginning to get worried that something went wrong.

Is the logo up top new?
I wouldn't call the logo new, but it wasn't up there before. Gibbon changed the logo on the actual site to that ages ago. Segaholic is just a slacker.

Posted: Tue Mar 28, 2006 8:11 pm
by Brazillian Cara
Popcorn wrote:This is just a quick note to say that my PC has recently exploded, and so I won't be making my presence known for a while yet, but rest assured that my profound anger has not yet subsideded and that as soon as I get back you're all in big trouble.
Cosidering you spent three-or-so months without posting anything, that'll hardly make any difference.
And for your anger, try chewing some gum.

Posted: Wed Mar 29, 2006 1:33 pm
by jenkins
The commandments strike me as a little harsh, but I can't argue that the general state of things has improved around here. Also, they are extremely amusing and well written.

Er, what exactly is Locit referring to? I haven't noticed any change in the text boxes whatsoever.

Posted: Wed Mar 29, 2006 5:48 pm
by Brazillian Cara
A few late toughts about the new commandments:

"<b>Thou shalt not link to webcomics in place of a reply.</b>
Absolutely no linking to individual webcomic strips, regardless of how relevant they may be to the conversation."

Wait, does this means we just can't post them without saying anything else, or the links themselves are prohibited in any way? Explanation, please.

"<b>Thou shalt not state the bloody fucking obvious.</b>
In the name of all that is intelligent and right with the world, do not ever use the phrase "in my opinion," "in my humble opinion," "in my personal opinion," or any of the acronyms used to represent such verbiage. We know it's your goddamn opinion."

You know, there is quite a difference between saying something is shit or saying something is shit on your opinion. It depends on the context.

Posted: Wed Mar 29, 2006 10:16 pm
by j-man
These news rules are all furry muff, but I do have a couple of questions.

On the subject of posting anecdotes/regaling stories of yesteryear, you state it is now expressly forbidden. To be honest, I enjoyed the occasional insight into the lives of the GHZ posters and found them generally amusing. Is the rule overlooked when a discussion is sparked from the anecdote, or is it a blanket rule left untampered no matter the situation?

On the subject of posting Flash videos (I'm taking the rule as forbidding the posting of all humorous or interesting links in general) does this also only apply when no discussion is involved? Can links be used as long as we spend a few pages bitching at each other afterwards in the twisted mockery of conversation that we call a forum debate?

All in all it appears the board is being reshaped into a strict games-only discussion from. I can imagine that getting stale quickly, but then that's just my opinion (see what I did there lols). Maybe it's just me and my childlike, primary-coloured outlook on life, but it seems the GHZ "fun factor" just dropped quicker than a whore's undies.

Posted: Wed Mar 29, 2006 11:38 pm
by Zeta
All in all it appears the board is being reshaped into a strict games-only discussion from. I can imagine that getting stale quickly, but then that's just my opinion (see what I did there lols). Maybe it's just me and my childlike, primary-coloured outlook on life, but it seems the GHZ "fun factor" just dropped quicker than a whore's undies.
Especially since most of us are disgusting old curmogeons who hate 90 percent of games out there.

Posted: Thu Mar 30, 2006 3:33 am
by BlazeHedgehog
Weird. The forums wouldn't let me log in from the front page. I'd click it, it'd refresh the page like it logged me in, but I'd still be logged out. Eventually I clicked "Profile" to see what that would do, it asked me to log in again and finally stuck, that time.

I dig the new color scheme. Feels... more polished, or something. The black headers are a little bit weird, though.

Posted: Thu Mar 30, 2006 10:13 am
by Omni Hunter
The rules do seem to go against the grain of most GHZ posters, most of us have posted one-liners and anecdotes in the past.
It's natural for topics to eventually deviate (even to the extent of nekkid boobies) and if there's no deviation, information is eventually going to be regurgitated. That may be a point to end a topic but the topics will be noticably shorter.

Not to say the rules are all bad, but as long as they can be adapted to forum-user feedback it should be all fine.

Posted: Thu Mar 30, 2006 12:56 pm
by Frieza2000
He isn't condemning one-liners, he's condemning one line discussions. If you're being funny then the length is irrelevant, but if you're trying to make a point then make a whole point. And if you're not doing either then don't post.

Nor did he mention topic deviation. When he said relevant, I'm pretty sure he was including tangential discussions as well as tangents of tangents of tangential discussions. He's trying to eliminate redundant posts or posts that don't communicate anything we care about such as your personal unsubstantiated feelings. We've all seen the forums where any given topic contains 3 pages of every active poster restating the first post simply to be heard or recognized as part of the community. If anybody here wants that they're definitely in the wrong place. So don't be afraid to post, just don't post every thought that jumps into your head.

While I'm at it, I might as well note that these rules are much less stern than I was expecting from all of the drama Popcorn and 'holic gave them and I have no qualms with them. I'm particularly fond of our burial of the IMO filler. Owen Axel is right, it can soften the tonality of a post, but if we all agree to assume that none of us are being arrogant in our assertions then it's unnecessary.

Posted: Thu Mar 30, 2006 2:50 pm
by Baba O'Reily
I do not question the wisdom of my e-overlords. That being said, I do not agree with some rule changes, but I will follow them anyways, unquestioningly, until I accidentally break one, at which point I will begin to question their purpose. But that day is far from now.

And as for numerical rating systems, it's much more clear than stating, "Well, this was a good game, but there were some flaws. I can see ways it could be improved, but in some aspects it was good. It's sort of like playing a platformer, but also an RPG and a racing game, but with no course, and like you're floating on a boat, and then all of a sudden, you see a light, and you ascend to the heavens."

Code: Select all

Mod: Disagreement shall not be tolerated.

Posted: Thu Mar 30, 2006 3:06 pm
by Frieza2000
Not so. I could interpret a number in several ways, whereas reading that paragraph makes it clear that you're retarded and that I shouldn't be listening to you either way.